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Dangerous...and Fabulous
Yashodian Tales
Old Friends...Nothing But Bookends... 
16th-Nov-2008 05:04 am
Cartoon Doc
That's rubbish Paul, old friends are less like bookends and more like the shelves...constant, unchanging, and always running through your life no matter how easy it is to ignore them, until they break. And what sits atop is what is afflicted by a variable rate of change.

Amy apologized the other day for not having time to chat extensively, and yet I realized we have somehow managed to have a 5-15 minute conversation every other day at least. I thought how much easier these 5-15-30 minute conversations are, just keeping pace with the here and now of each other's lives, none of this "let's have a 2 hour catch up on everything that's happened in each other's lives," which frankly terrifies me, and is the reason I haven't called some people who I would consider quite close. I DREAD that. There's no personality or friendship involved in a factual catchup.

Ignoring the absences and moving on...that lends extra importance to the congruences of life. And makes it easier to maintain in the future. It's not just Amy though. I spoke to Ashleigh, and we had about 2 minutes of "what we've been upto" lame chitchat, before we got right into being that being that is "me and ashleigh," just like there are beings of "me and amy," or "me and kristi," or "me and 'insert group here'". Kat called me, and it was for no other reason than to ask for a book recommendation while she was at Borders. It's like we call each other every day to talk about random shit, just like we used to back in college! And it made me exceedingly happy :)

All that's left is Kristi, you elusive elusive bastard with no voice. peter i will see you tomorrow.
Comments 
6th-Dec-2008 06:55 am (UTC) - hmmm
Anonymous
Well, I agree that a catch-up conversation is not inherently going to be like instantly dropping you into old times, I don't think you can just pretend that XX amount of time with no updating on life has occurred. It is the mark of a friend to be interested in the life of the other friend.

A detail by detail rehash is a bit much, but, you have to ask yourself how much do you want to be around a person at all if you don't want to know what he/she has been going over the last couple years or whatever it is.

As your example of Kat calling about a book shows, it is nice to have everything in a normal keel, but life is just too complicate and, at times, time/space divisive for everyone to be on simple, normal terms with everyone else.

My two cents...

-- doooooooooooooooooooooo
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